I love you, now go away: Spilling over high tea

Seriously, I do love my husband. I ought to; we’ve been married over 30 years now! We might have the strongest marriage of all our siblings (one is separated, one sort of hates each other’s guts but stay together, one seems pretty good but those children make it hard to work on the marriage).

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High tea: any wonder I’m planning that for my birthday?

That doesn’t mean I don’t like a little alone time now and again. More time to enjoy my tea (hot beverage of choice; not a coffee drinker here).

I am joining up with CocoDeborah, and Lynda for their ultimate coffee date anyway.

The Ultimate Coffee Date

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would tell you that my husband was out of town just overnight this week. It was a nice little break. For me, anyway.

I love my husband, and having lived apart due to his job in the past, I know that while I can live alone, I’d rather live with him.

That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy a little break once in a while: more computer time to work on the blog, watching the movie I really want to, making the meals I really want to.

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would tell you that deviating from my training plan (which I just barely began) always makes me anxious.

And then I get sick, and all I want is to be able to move again!

I wasn’t really sick this week, but I was feeling a little off, with muscle aches and a slightly elevated temperature.

I took a few extra rest days, but seriously, with grocery shopping, laundry, cooking, dog walking, animal caretaking — it’s hard to rest!

So rest meant a couple of days with very little formal exercise (yet I still managed to almost get in close to 10,000 steps those days).

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I like to plan . . .

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would tell you that I have you, my fellow running bloggers, to thank for not sticking strictly to my training plan, which had barely even begun.

On my own I probably would have.

I channeled all my fellow bloggers who are so good at listening to their bodies to help me feel a little calmer about those extra rest days.

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would tell you that I think blogging is easier if you work outside the home.

Before you jump down my throat, let me explain. My guess is a lot of people are chained to a desk at work and they’re at least part of the time commenting and answering comments while multitasking at work.

I am not terribly attached to my phone, and so I will work on the blog for an hour or two in the morning and then I am on to other stuff or out running errands (and no, I rarely check my phone while I’m out — the cell phone is not the best way to get a hold of me!).

Granted, I don’t have all those pesky work tasks and meetings interfering in my blogging time.

I’m not a millenial, so I didn’t grow up with a cell phone attached to my hands.

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would you that I just have real trouble documenting my life. I know that people are drawn into blogs with photos, but as I said, I don’t always have my phone around (or iPod, since that’s what I use to take photos with usually) and most of the time I just don’t think about taking photos.

It’s just not a way of life for me. But it makes for a kind of boring blog! I’m working on it. Any tips for me?

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would you that blogging is good for my shopping addiction. Oh sure, sometimes it’s bad for it too, but I find I often don’t have the time to shop online that I did before I devoted so much time to my blog!

This is not a bad thing.

If we were enjoying high tea . . .
I would tell you had an epiphany about Weight Watchers, or really just weight loss in general, while I was in the shower the other day. Doesn’t everyone have the best thoughts in the shower?

Anyway, I’ve had more than one Weight Watchers friend who has been hugely successful on the program. And then eventually they decide it’s no longer working for them and they quit Weight Watchers (insert your “diet” of choice there).

And they begin gaining back the weight they’ve lost.

And that’s just the problem: they’re viewing it as a diet and not a lifestyle — or, in other words, that it’s something you do temporarily and then you go back to your “real” life.

Except all those things you did to successfully lose the weight? You can’t stop doing them if you want to maintain your weight. Trust me on that — I have learned that in 25 years of weight loss/maintenance efforts.

Yeah, it really kind of sucks sometimes. Only it really doesn’t. If going to weekly meetings, planning what I eat, and tracking what I eat are the tools I need to maintain my weight, they’re a small price to pay.

Diets are temporary. Healthy habits are a way of life and will help you to maintain and not struggle so much.

Take it from someone who struggled for decades!

Tea? Iced Tea? Coffee? Decaf? Or something else?

Do you diet or do you make healthy lifestyle changes?

45 thoughts on “I love you, now go away: Spilling over high tea

  1. Definitely tea! And yes, sometimes blogging is easier outside the home, but it’s definitely easier with a smart phone! 😀 And I’m all about healthy choices, portion control, and exercise! While I’m nowhere near my ideal weight, the scale goes down, not up and down. But that took years and years to learn… and many, many diets!! As for the photos… just click away! It’s ALL interesting to those who weren’t there with you!! Have a great weekend!! 🙂

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    1. I do have a smart phone, but I really don’t use it a whole lot, partly because we don’t have unlimited anything & partly because it’s constantly running out of space.

      Since I don’t work, though, I don’t have a need for more stuff on it.

      I actually am at my goal weight, technically, and I maintain it within about 5 lbs; I’m still maintaining the wrong weight, though, because sometimes I’m more than a couple of pounds above that GW.

      So yes, I’d still like to lose a little weight, and yes, I believe I will . . . some year.

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  2. I feel the same way when my husband goes away – I can watch “my” shows – but it’s always good when he gets home again! As for your weight watchers realization, the “last” time I lost weight I really focused on keeping it off and came up with this silly mantra – If I go back to my old ways, I will get back to my old weight.

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    1. I don’t think that mantra is silly at all!

      I hope that this is the last time I’ll need to lose 40 lbs (done that more than once in my life).

      So far this is the longest I’ve been able to maintain a weight loss, and barring illness, I don’t really see that changing too much.

      And yes, it is nice when he’s back home!

      It was also nice that I don’t need to stay up later for Lola, because with Chester, who couldn’t hold it as long even when he wasn’t sick, I did and I was always so tired.

      Lola likes to go to bed even earlier than me!

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    1. My husband doesn’t travel as much as he used to; it used to be a lot!

      Yes, it is nice to have them come back, although on longer trips, it’s an adjustment. He’s started to get up earlier in the mornings, which means I have to tell him no tv until after I’ve had my breakfast!

      Heck, my parents have been married 60+ yrs (like getting close to 70!). But my mom was 19 when they got married.

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  3. I am on a two week hiatus from activity and exercise and, boy do I want to move! On the other hand, having that extra 25 minutes before work in the morning and not juggling to fit everything in is a nice break. But I’m hoping for good news from the orthopedic physician next week. I’ve not changed my eating but I’ve gained a couple of pounds (which is okay as I was slightly underweight) but feeling logy with the inactivity.

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    1. How I wish gaining weight was ever a good thing for me!

      I know, however, from being sick and totally unable to exercise occasionally, that it’s really about what you eat, not the exercise (although exercise is good on sooooooo many levels).

      I didn’t exercise a whole lot this week, but I didn’t gain either. Lots of soup, veggies, garlic etc. to knock out whatever was bothering me!

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  4. Me? Multitask? At work? No…. Yes, it is very easy to hop onto the blog to check comments or read a few on the links. But talk about guilt! I really don’t have time for it but it’s a pull I can’t seem to resist most days. I should fire myself! Ha. I get the needed break thing. We’ve been married almost as long as you. They are necessary. I hope you are feeling better.

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  5. No, I don’ do diets ! If you want lasting change, you need to make lasting changes. I did weight watchers too and loved it because it taught me about portion size.

    And even if I work in an office, I don’t blog at work. Work is for work and my private life happens at home, before and after work.

    And sometimes we just feel blah. That happens… pick up your plan where you left off. I am sure you have a solid base anyway !

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  6. Glad you backed off when you weren’t feeling great. The best part of the Caveman being gone, which he was all last week, is I can eat earlier and I don’t have to have so much red meat. Meat is fine, but not to the extent he likes it, which is very rare, so there’s little I can even do with it besides a quick broil. I enjoyed lots of soup and salad while he was gone.

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    1. Oh yes, me too!

      We don’t do a lot of meat at all, much to his chagrin. I’m not sure we’ve had any since Chester’s been gone- thankfully he likes fish!

      Tonight we’re planning to go out for bbq (not really my thing ).

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  7. I’m a chai latte’ kind of person. I LOVE the smell of coffee…but the taste? Not so much 😉 And, I do enjoy an occasional break from the husband, too. I am having several epiphanies regarding blogging recently…as much as I love recording my journey and sharing pics and interacting with so many other great blogger pals, I simply cannot do it 24/7 and post everyday. You know, someone has to clean the house and buy the groceries and entertain the dog when no one else is home. I”m trying to write and post twice/week, and that’s pretty time-consuming. Oh, and you probably know how I feel about following a training plan exactly as written LOL

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  8. Ha! I totally relate to a little break. I have always been a loner, but for years we worked completely opposite schedules so we saw each other like once a week. Now we are home at the exact same times always and this loner rarely has a minute…
    You know some months working and blogging is okay, but this is our busiest season for the next two months as applications and enrollment are done and I can’t read at all during the day and it is hard to want to even want to log on when I get home. My brain us is so noddled from the day I don’t want to read anything…I struggled last year at this time to keep up, I guess time will I how I hold up this year.
    I have always battled the weight, and currently I am getting to a place where good habits are not enough. I am seeing the scale go up up up

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  9. You’re so right about the diet versus lifestyle mindset, It’s still a work in progress for me, but I’m getting there. This time around I’m not as rigid about WW as I was the first time, but that’s because I’m trying to feel my way towards a maintainable balance for the rest of my life rather than losing weight quickly. It helps that this time I’m only worried about 10-15 pounds as opposed to the 110 I lost the first time, so I feel like my health is not in such dire peril that I can’t afford to take the slow route. 🙂

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  10. I will agree, my job does allow me to blog a lot during working hours. I don’t go around making it public in my office but as long as it does’nt get in the way of my paying job I feel like I can do both. Honestly I would not be able to read as many blogs as I do each and every week if I could only do it on my own time.
    I love the time I spend with my husband as well, but I also love the times when he does his thing I do mine! Like right now, I’m blogging and he’s working outside on something….
    Enjoy your weekend Judy!

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  11. I feel the same way – I really like it when my husband goes out for the evening and I have the house to myself! It’s nothing personal, but sometimes it’s just lovely to be just me. That said, I don’t like sleeping apart from him (after what felt like ages of getting used to sleeping with him, I now can’t sleep well without him!).

    I know what you mean about the photos and documenting life too – I’m not very good at it either, but I’m trying hard to get my camera out a little bit more.

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    1. There have been several times in our marriage when my husband traveled a lot; now he doesn’t travel so much anymore. There was a period before we moved up here when he was here, in NY, & I was in TX — for almost 2 yrs!

      It’s good to know I’m not the only one that feels that way, although I was pretty sure that was the case!

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      1. Wow! Two years must have been a real killer! My husband doesn’t travel all that much, though he did have a trip to Austin last year which took him out for a week (I missed him quite a lot then!).

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      2. Too bad you didn’t get to go to Austin — that’s where I was living while we were apart (because we were hoping eventually he would find another job there and we’d keep our house, but it wasn’t meant to be).

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  12. I totally hear you on that alone time. Funny story. My husband and I were both at the same conference this past week for work. We booked separate hotel rooms because we wanted to have our own schedule with working in evenings/mornings and access to the bathroom. All my co-workers thought it was incredibly strange, but seemed normal to us!

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    1. I gotta admit, that is a bit odd, but hey, if it works for you!

      My husband and I have traveled together for work — but only one of us was working. Mostly him, but there was a time I traveled occasionally for work, too, and he got to come along.

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  13. I am with you on the alone time which I rarely get staying home with three kids. But running becomes my quiet time and my husband is supportive of this, telling me to get out of the house for a run, stop for a coffee, enjoy some quiet. As far as dieting, I did this a lot growing up, starting as early as third grade. It was horribly irresponsible and I only grew out of it once I started running regularly. Again, running saved the day! But I find that if I structure my running on a plan (tempos, speed work, etc.) I lose all passion for it. So I just get out there and have fun. For me, it’s the healthiest plan. My, oh, my, your honesty made me blabber on and on–thank you for sharing. As for documenting…when you have those moments, seeing something that makes you laugh or brighten your day, snap a photo (phone or a little camera). It can be like a special moment journal. 🙂

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    1. I really didn’t go on my first formal diet until I had to fit into my sister’s wedding dress.

      Then about 5 years later I joined WW, and while it’s been an on again off again thing over the last 25 yrs, that’s what works for me.

      I don’t have kids, so i do have lots of alone time, but sometimes I still like alone time where I can make veggie meals, which is what I prefer.

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  14. I love chai tea lattes! Honestly, I’m not crazy about taking photos all the time, sometimes I want to be in the moment, but there is pressure to post on Instagram and of course have good photos for the blog! I also agree about blogging outside of home – until I set up a home office, hitting the coffee shop once in a while on weekends is a great alternative!

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    1. Well, we sort of have a home office, aka a man cave (previously I did work from home & had a home office), but the truth is right now I don’t make any money from the blog and I doubt I’ll ever make enough to consider it a real job but you never know.

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  15. Over 30 years!! Amazing!! 10 for me in October….let’s see if we make it-lol. Year 9 was really hard.

    Is it bad that I sometimes wish my husband went away on business trips….

    Multi tasking at work for sure. I find little time at home to blog especially with the kids.

    I take my phone with me everywhere but don’t always take pictures and I don’t realize until I got to post in the blog and then realize.

    Rest..rest…rest. The body would respond well.

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